Ratified Article: The Terminator
We, the Men, do hereby declare that all Men shall accept as his sacred duty, the extermination and removal of any and all bugs and pests from the Home, and removal of any and all dead animals from the Home, regardless of origin or circumstance.
Mandated Exceptions
- A team effort may be required for efficacious removal of bodily pests such as Lice, Scabies, Chiggers, Leeches, and Screw-worms
Exception for lice, which may be handled by a domestic partner.
How do “Pests” such as spinster sister-in-laws, mother-in-laws, and my personal favorite, the “upwardly-mobile bitchy friend from work” factor in here? I would think that for the general sanity and sanctity of the home the proper man is still required to rid the premises of these creatures, though with the use of the highest degree of panache.